Irritable Women Gone Wild

“I’ve got peace like a river…I’ve got love like an ocean…I’ve got joy like a fountain in my soul…”

And then there's the menopausal woman. Impatience like a heathen, aggression like a vermin - she’s got mood swings by the dozen in her soul…

Irritable woman gone wild. It's not pretty.

It’s not that being irritable is every mid-life woman’s goal. She’s not out hunting for prey. She does actually have a remnant of nurturing compassion left in her – as evidenced by the spontaneous, random tears that could fill the above mentioned river.

It’s just that those stupid "7 Dwarves of Menopause" have a way of sneaking into the cottage, unwelcomed and uninvited. Itchy, Bitchy, Sleepy, Sweaty, Bloated, Forgetful, and Psycho will visit every woman on the planet – at some point after 40. And every woman will have a decision to make. Either she will invite these visitors in and allow them to take over her house, seize her identity and steal her serenity –or she will acknowledge their presence, take a look at their calling card and then seek to evict them before a tornado of snappy comments and slammed doors forces a zillion apologies.

Bitchy’s in the House

Verbally attacking everyone within a 3-mile radius is not a normal emotional state of being. But one day the store clerk seemed like a nice kid that you’d like to cook supper for and introduce to your daughter. Then Bitchy arrived like an alien takeover, possessed you - and suddenly dumb store clerk guy is an incompetent idiot who gave you the wrong change, and could he BE any slower? Could he WEAR his pants any lower?

And then you feel guilty for threatening to talk to his manager.

And then you go home and throw a shoe at the dog for being...um...in your way.

And then you feel guilty for being so rude to the only member of the family who remains loyal in spite of Bitchy.

So you pet the dog and throw a shoe at grown child # 3 for putting his unusually smelly socks on the table next to the pizza you had to get for dinner because you freakin' don't have the energy to cook for someone who shouldn't even be living with you.

And then you feel guilty. And you cry for being a rotten mother, grandmother and all around horrible human being.

And then your BFF calls and cancels the coffee date you were looking forward to.

And you hate her. And then you feel guilty because hate is such a strong emotion. And then you cry.

Bitchy makes Itchy look good.

Bitchy’s Calling Card

Bitchy gives himself away easily, when he appears somewhere in your late 40’s or early 50’s and shows his calling card:

Mood swings

Irritability

Impatience

Frustration

Aggression

Dissatisfaction. With everything.

Overly sensitive and easily offended

Argumentative

There is some debate about whether Bitchy is actually fueled by the hormonal imbalance of menopause such as declining estrogen and progesterone - or if he simply gains momentum from the symptoms of menopause – such as hot flashes, sleep deficits, weight gain, etc.

But estrogen is known for its ability to increase serotonin and endorphins, which are typically associated with a positive mood. So, it makes sense that when estrogen declines, serotonin (the happy hormone) declines.

In addition, progesterone is your calming hormone – the one that keeps the peace like a river and helps you chill out. It also aids in sleep. So, when that declines…well…yeah. Not so calm and chilled.

Interestingly, research shows that the hormonal change and imbalance of menopause can actually cause a woman to interpret the things she hears as being more negative – causing her to be set off by hot button words or phrases! Whoa! That explains a lot!

Regardless of what door Bitchy enters through – it’s unnerving for a once balanced, calm and rational woman to find herself in the throes of chronic irritability.

So, if you’ve chased away potential friends, job offers, store clerks and small neighborhood pets, then it’s time to clamp down on Bitchy and rebalance your life. Do this before the destruction around you nears holocaust proportions.

Bitchy’s Eviction Notice

Here are a few tips and suggestions for throwing down Bitchy, the rudest of the seven dwarves of menopause:

*Accept an angry moment for what it is. The reality: you cannot take back what you said in a moment of irritability and anger. The words have been flung and the damage is done. There is no point groveling in guilt for every snappy thing that flies out of you. Because then you have made one problem into two problems. When you dish it out – be willing to apologize - sincerely, humbly and simply. Seek forgiveness from those you've stunned, and then forgive yourself.

*Consider the learning options that Bitchy can teach you. In other words, turn around what is meant for evil – into something good – like insight into the little nuggets of truth about yourself. Often there is a revelation about unresolved issues and emotions in the very circumstances that provoke Bitchy to speak and act.

*Hang out with people that make you laugh. Laughter is therapy. Not that you might think it’s funny that you’re so irritable you could chew through steel – but that there are some funny common experiences that women share when going through menopause – and quite frankly, you’re the only ones who can find the humor in them. I’m pretty sure the store clerk you yelled at won’t think it’s funny. In fact, he is probably crying even as we speak. Go apologize to him. But no guilt!

*Exercise. Sorry. Oops, there it is. But don’t be all at the gym getting mad and steamed because you can’t get on the elliptical because stupid blonde girls in skimpy exercise clothing have refused to leave YOUR machine. No – exercise in a minimally frustrating environment! And do something fun! Zumba! Dance! Exercise produces the serotonin that you’re missing from the estrogen that is declining. Some women find yoga to be a calming, excellent resource to neutralize the effects of Bitchy and declining progesterone. Give it a try!

*Get outside – into fresh air – often! A 20-minute walk in the sunshine is like a tonic for irritability!

*Scrutinize your nutrition - seriously. You’re gonna need to beef up those B vitamins and essential fatty acids! Get rid of the junk food! I know it seems like you crave junk food to ease a bad mood. But in actuality – your body is craving clean, whole, natural, real food with vitamins, minerals, enzymes and stuff that really makes you feel better! Trust me on this! If you eat the 15 Oreos and then freak out because you feel fat and bloated and want to bury someone alive…I did warn you…

*A healthy sex life can help! Okay. So, please don’t freak out about that tip or write me mean letters. If I leave this obvious one out of the list, it will only appear that I’m too chicken to deal with it. And I’m not. I realize that menopausal women can fluctuate between “Don’t touch me” and “How YOU doin’?” – and consequently the mixed messages can bring great confusion to men who have their own issues at this age. But the bottom line is that if you can get your signals worked out with the Mr. – it’s just helpful, that’s all.

*Find a “venting” partner. A friend or family member who is also dealing with menopausal madness is best – just because she totally gets it. Vent away. And then strategize together how to resolve the stuff you vented about.

*Get 7-8 hours of sleep a night. It’s absolutely crucial. This is a discipline that often requires a tough transitional stance that we’ll talk about more when Sleepy rolls into town next post. But research shows that sleep deprivation is one of the main causes of a host of diseases, ailments, illnesses and yeah – irritability.

*Look to the future…Bitchy doesn’t stay forever. Fight the good fight and know there is hope for the mellow wisdom of balance that comes…eventually. It really does.

And with that...here's a little video that made me chuckle. I'm in no way endorsing the product in the video - just the chuckle it gave me - since a chuckle is all part of the medicine...so enjoy!

Cheryl

Next Post Up: Sleepless in...Pretty Much Everywhere

Postcard from Hell...

I found out I was in menopause via a postcard...that arrived in my mailbox. I'm pretty sure you can't top that - unless you found out about your "change 'o life" from someone with a megaphone driving through the neighborhood. That might as well have been what happened to me. You see, I had befriended the mail carrier - in a good neighbor kinda way. He and I would often exchange small talk at the mail box, because back in the day when postal mail actually contained handwritten letters, I anticipated his arrival.

Until the dark day of the postcard that heralded my fate.

"You are in menopause," the doctor wrote on the postcard. This doctor actually had handwriting you could read. I really didn't want my mail carrier to know that about me. I didn't want the entire U. S. Post Office to know it either. I didn't even want to know.

Now, besides questioning my doctor's communication style - you might be wondering why she would need to announce this news at all. Usually women kinda know when they are "in menopause" and don't need a postcard reminder that the reason they are itchy, bitchy, sweaty, sleepy, bloated, forgetful and PSYCHO is because their childbearing years, to put it nicely, are pretty much over and they have entered the season of...change. All kinds of change. Every change possible, actually.

Well, my excuse for being surprised by this news is because I was only 43 when I went to see the doc about my urge to place my entire body in the freezer at night. Did you know that hot flashes can be the symptom of some serious diseases? True story! I found this out while researching what I was going to tell the doctor was wrong with me.

But it's really hard to convince a 50-year-old female doctor that you have a serious disease when your symptoms involve night sweats, sleep deprivation, steamed reading glasses and a I-would-like-to-kill-you-all-in-your-sleep attitude.

But she ran "tests." I awaited them anxiously and anticipated the worst. And the test results were documented...in the postcard. Apparently, menopause is not good reason for a phone call.

And so I entered the season of denial ("I'm too young for this") and eventually moved towards acceptance. You see, you can't really do away with the dreaded thing. Every woman on the planet will experience it. But...there are ways you can manage the symptoms and the impact of declining hormones - and seriously live your best life yet!

I believe this wholeheartedly - which is why I've spent the past 20 years researching the subject and why I feel passionate about this blog. When I see women yield to the 7 dwarves of menopause as if they are inevitable miseries that justify the end of all happiness as we know it - I can get a little preachy. Trust me, I can. Because these are actually my best years. Ever. And I want women over 40, 50, 60, 70 and beyond to find the real, wonderful, beautiful woman buried in that itchy, bitchy, forgetful body that hasn't had a really good quality sleep in like forever.

I agree to acknowledge that the 7 dwarves might show up at the front door of the cottage - and even sit down a spell. But I'm not willing to adopt them and give them my name. I will say "Hi" and sometimes laugh at their jokes. But I have no problem letting them know who runs this house.

And so for the next 7 posts - I'll have something to say about each one. Consider it revenge for the postcard that showed up in my mailbox almost 20 years ago.

We'll start with...

Itchy

So, one night you are thinking that an 8-hour stretch of sleep looks promising. Just as you are settling into a rare relaxed place, you develop an itch on your leg. You scratch, and scratch, and scratch and scratch until you're pretty sure you've got no skin left in that general area - and like an uncontrolled animal you think it might be time for a visit to the vet to get a cone that prevents you from reaching...whatever it is that's making you go insane with itching.

Some nights it is the leg or foot or ankle. Sometimes the arms. Sometimes it is the traveling itch.

Well, here's the deal. That crazy imbalance and decline of hormones - particularly, estrogen - has dried. you. out. Skin. Hair. Everywhere. And that is the general reason why so many women get acquainted with Itchy somewhere in their 50's.

Dehydration. Big time. I'm not a fan of insanity-mode itching. And I don't want to be hooked on Benadryl. There is a better way - and here are a few tips for slaying Itchy before he takes up nightly residence with you.

1. Increase your water intake. When I say water, I really am saying...water. No other liquid will hydrate you the same way. Caffeine DE-hydrates you. Juices will give some hydration but added calories and sugar. And soda? Don't even get me started.... Seriously, at this time of your life, it is time to become a water lover, even if you haven't ever truly appreciated the fountain of life before.

2. Exfoliate your skin on a regular basis. Using a good scrub or AHA (alpha-hydroxy acid) product will help slough off those dead cells that are so prominent with dry skin and help smooth the skin, to reduce itchy dryness. I love Aveda's Foot Relief cream for feet and legs! It smooths and exfoliates and also contains cooling essential oils that minimize itch.

3. Moisturize, moisturize, condition, condition. You may have never needed much body moisturizer or hair conditioner when you were younger. But now, your skin and hair seems to drink it in! Moisturize everyday with a quality, natural moisturizer. I love shea butter creams, as well as creams with hydroxy acids to exfoliate while moisturizing. Stay away from moisturizers with mineral oil. It clogs your pores, and it's a creepy petroleum based chemical. A little essential peppermint oil mixed in with your moisturizer will also minimize the sensations of Itchy.

Same with hair conditioner - you'll need a deeper treatment than you once did because while your hair tends to thin during menopause (boo!) - it always dries WAY out. Use products that are as natural as possible. My favorite is pure coconut oil!

One exciting new anti-aging moisturizer - well, it's not new - it's just being talked about a lot since it got a plug from Dr. Oz - is rose hip seed oil. A few drops in your body and face moisturizer could be a great anti-aging addition for dry, itchy skin according to research results. And it's natural! Read about it on this link: http://www.livestrong.com/article/182240-how-to-use-rose-hip-seed-oil/

4. Detoxify your system. When your liver gets loaded down with processing too many chemicals or otherwise unnatural substances that have been ingested - you can get itchy! Take 2-7 days and give your liver a break. Detoxify with a clean, whole foods diet. Load up on fresh fruit and veggies and good, healthy fats (olives/olive oil, nuts, salmon, avocados, 72% or higher dark chocolate). And eliminate all processed food, caffeine, alcohol and hormone-injected meats. You'll feel better, your liver will thank you - and you may see a significant glow to your skin and an elimination of the itchies!

5. Consider bio-identical hormones. The choice to supplement with bio-identical hormones or plant-based hormones is highly personal. I have been taking them for about 7 years now and I won't be without them - as in, ever. But not everyone feels called to that. When I say "bio-identical" hormones - I'm not referring to prescription hormones such as Premarin that is synthesized from the urine of pregnant horses and is not fully compatible with human hormones (thus the tremendous risk of side effects). To understand better the concept of bio-identical hormone supplementation, check the following link:

http://ageology.com/women/bioidentical-hormones

Let me also throw this out concerning Itchy.... One of my least favorite things to hear from a doctor is, "Well, these things happen when you get older." I have never in my life been "allergic" or "sensitive" to foods until...the big "M." Suddenly, I was having itchy hives and red splotches and assorted other sensitivity reactions to foods I had previously been able to eat just fine. And yes, my doctor said..."Well, when you get older..your body changes." Really?

The indication was that sometimes Itchy shows up in the form of a food sensitivity that you never previously had! Urgh! A few common food sensitivities that pop up around menopause are: gluten, dairy, shellfish, red wine, and dear God, no....chocolate.

For this reason, it is important to always carry a couple Benadryl in your purse - just in case!

And so, that takes care of Itchy. Next post - we'll attempt to slay...Bitchy. You'll need to pray for me on that one.

Cheryl

And just for fun...because I used to love the Cosby Show...enjoy this humorous clip from the Menopause episode...

Growing "Old" Gracefully. What? No Seriously, What??

Does the title of this post indicate my disgruntled attitude towards the phrase “growing old gracefully?”  Well, my first issue with this phrase is the word “old.” What is “old?”  Is that like an old shoe, an old boyfriend, an old carton of milk growing sour in the refrigerator?

And my second issue with the phrase, “growing old gracefully” is that…okay…I don’t really get it.  I must confess…that’s my bottom line.

 

If I don’t color my gray roots, is that the “graceful” way to be “old?”  If I say, “I’m getting’ too old for this” like a million times per week and refuse to dance like the 35-year-old I’m not, is that “growing old gracefully?”  If I stop wearing make-up, stop using anti-aging skin care, and stop laughing…is that “graceful” “aging?” If I stop using quotation marks around every “word,” would that be less “irritating?”

But really…when you hear that phrase – what does it conjure up in your mind?  I’m sure it doesn’t revile you quite as much as it does me – but if it does, why?  And if it doesn’t...why?

Here’s the full-of-holes reasoning for my own distaste of the phrase.  As I exited my 40’s, in the throes of hot flashes and mood swings and nonstop crying and craving cookies and chocolate while my metabolism took a nose dive…I made the mistake of cracking a little joke to a friend. The interchange went like this:

 

My first statement of doom:  “I may need to take on a second job in order to afford all the anti-aging products and make-up I’m going to need in the future for looking younger. I hate looking old-ER.” 

My friend’s response (wait for it…):  “Well, I think a woman should just grow old gracefully.”

My second stupid line of doom: “Well, I am not very graceful.  And I don’t like the word “old.” And I really, really love my make-up.”

My friend’s next knife thrust: “Outer things are not important.  It’s the inner self that is important.  Wisdom comes from aging.”

The thought that I kept to myself:  “Widsom.  Eww. Give me a lip plumping gloss and blonde highlights any day. And some estrogen."

So, there you have it…a glimpse into my shallow anti-aging philosophy...when it comes to the outer things, that is.  I do have a much more meaningful and purposeful approach to all things internal and valuable.  Really.

And over the last decade I have tried, used and loved a variety of anti-aging products, pretty colors, make-up, skin care – and enjoyed every moment of my girlie dress up journey that began with sneaking my mom's red lipstick as a child.  That girlie make-up love didn't end, by the way, just because I became…*drum roll*…menopausal.

What I have come to realize though – is that every woman over 50 with a proactive stance on maintaining health, vitality, passion and purpose eventually bumps into the reality that most cosmetics meant to make them feel prettier and look radiantly younger – contain harmful chemicals.  Lots of them. Ugh!

And some of these chemicals that we've been slathering on our faces and putting on our lips for decades are just now showing up in research to be anything BUT anti-aging.  That concerns me.  Because it totally works against my post-50 (um...60) health plan.

One issue that has been at the forefront of cosmetic news recently is the health concerns with lipstick. It's pretty scary to learn that each time you grab that tube of  gorgeous color that adds a youthful glow to your complexion and a spark to your great personality - you're coating your lips with the following possibilities:

1. Lead - a seriously scary toxin with big time health ramifications.
2. Methylparabens - the most widely used preservative in cosmetics and not at all good! In fact, the research is alarming because parabens are now being found in breast tumors, when they are examined post-biopsy.  The link to breast cancer is enough to avoid this ugly preservative!
3.Coal Tar - considered a "high hazard" substance by the EWG (Environmental Working Group) which considers it a carcinogen (cancer causing) that is linked to allergies and skin irritations.
4. Propylene/Butylene Glycol - a petroleum-based ingredient used in fertilizer and anti-freeze to name a few.
5. Mineral Oil - a petroleum-based ingredient that has been in cosmetics for decades!  Problem is that we are just now realizing the potential hazards of it.  On the softer side, it can block the skin's pores and can interfere with skin cell  functioning.  On the heavier side, it has been known to contain carcinogens.

There are a bunch more chemicals...but I cannot spell or pronounce them, so I'm ending my list here.

There is good news!  There are alternatives!  You can still have a youthful glow, a beautiful pucker and keep wrinkles at bay if you take the time to invest in some healthy products that you can feel good about using.  They're out there.  I've found them.  But I've had to do a lot of research and look at a whole lot of ingredient lists!  Some of those researched products you'll find within the links of this blog. One in particular deserves a shout out!

In my opinion, if you do nothing else to "age gracefully" (notice I'm leaving out the word "old" now...), throw on a little healthy lip color.  I don't know what it is, but a woman with a little color to her smile not only appears younger - she seems more approachable, friendlier, confident, well-rested, healthier.

Let me give you a suggestion.  There is a glorious brand of lipstick and lip gloss that is gluten free, paraben free, soy free, allergen free - and it is the most emollient, luxurious experience just putting it on your lips!  It's called Red Apple Lipstick - and I encourage you to become familiar with it.  I seriously threw away about 6 lipstick products I previously owned - and now only wear Red Apple.

Click on this link to read for yourself (check out the "Why Red Apple" tab!) about Red Apple:



I don't know about you, but I want to lose the phrase, "growing old gracefully" and replace it with something far more sassy.  Like "growing healthier and hotter after 50." Although there's probably nothing really graceful about that!

Enjoy this sassy little video by Red Apple Lipstick's, Andrea Harper, as she shows off one of their super awesome colors.  And let's begin to read labels, and make some healthy cosmetic choices for the future of our beautiful selves!

What's Your Plan? No Really. What Is It?

It's National Women's Health Week!  Quite frankly, I have no clue who decides when it is going to be National Anything Week. I found out about National Hamburger Week after the fact. And I got in on National Yogurt Week just in time to enter a contest for a case of Greek yogurt that I did not win. But National Women’s Health Week…that’s right up my alley! Especially being a woman over 50 (and 60) who totally understands that to be healthy, fit, and dynamic after 50 requires more work, action, perseverance, research and dedication than being healthy and awesome at 30…or even 40!

Being healthy (and awesome) after 50 requires a plan. It does. There is no way to eat everything you want, avoid regular exercise, fill your life with stress, ignore menopause and ignore aging…and just BE healthy. Nope. If being healthy in this second season is your goal, you need a plan.

So. What’s the plan?

We make plans for just about everything else. We create “to do” lists that schedule out the minutes of our lives. We plan vacations. We write short term and long term career goals.  We have business plans and dinner plans and know exactly what we’ll do with our income tax refund for the next 5 years. But we don’t always have a health and well-being plan. And the glitch is that if we don’t have a health plan, there may be no point in developing a long term anything else plan…

When we use the word “health,” most often we think of diet, nutrition, exercise and sleep.  All of those are components of being “healthy.”  However, we often forget that there are other pieces to our health that are equally important – such as our emotional, mental and spiritual health.
 

Here’s the deal. We are uniquely designed – and you really cannot isolate your emotional health from your physical health, nor can you separate your spiritual health from your emotional health, or your physical health from your spiritual health.  Compartmentalizing the pieces of our health is a disjointed view of health and an incomplete plan that will still leave you…unhealthy.
 

Our soul (mind and emotions), our spirit, and our physical body are uniquely and intricately woven together – and they absolutely affect each other.

For example – there is evidence that living with bitterness and resentment can affect the joints of the physical body.  In fact, various forms of arthritis, especially in the back, have been linked to negative emotions stored and ignored.  Anxiety can raise blood pressure and heart rate.  Prayer and meditation can bring heart rate and blood pressure down and help with stress.  Chronic lack of sleep can cause hallucinations, depression, and weight gain.  This list goes on and on.
 

And I know it sounds infinitely more holy to focus on spiritual matters vs. exercise or giving up the soda that you already know is detrimental to your health.  However, a physical body that is breaking down from too much sugar, too many processed, chemical-laced and hormone-injected  foods  – will cut short your ability to carry out the mission or calling for which you are destined. Again - you just can't separate the components that define our overall health.

So, what’s your plan?  Because as a woman over 50 (or close to)…you need one.  And if you’re a woman under 50…you pretty much need one, too.  Because the brutal truth is this:  You’re getting older,  you’re approaching menopause where great hormonal and metabolic shifts will happen (whether you like it or not) – and you’re living in an increasingly stressful, overly busy, chemical-laden culture.

What are you doing right now to maximize and protect your health and quality of life when you’re 60, 70, 80, 90?

Take a moment to answer the following questions:

1.        What am I doing right now to protect my bone density from decreasing as I get older?

2.       What am I doing right now to protect myself from Type II diabetes, heart disease, breast cancer?

3.       What am I doing right now to maintain/gain muscle mass and maintain strength and balance?

4.       What am I doing right now to protect my mind and memory from disengaging?

5.       What am I doing right now to balance my stress?

6.       What am I doing right now to protect myself from depression and/or anxiety?

7.       What am I doing right now to maintain a healthy weight or lose excess weight?

8.       What am I doing right now to find peace in the midst of stressful, difficult circumstances?

9.       What am I doing right now to let go of unhealthy habits, emotions, routines, addictions?

10.   What am I doing right now to enhance, gain, maintain healthy social relationships?

If you answer “Nothing” to two or more of these questions – it is time to lay down any defensiveness, any excuses, any tasks you’ve deemed more important than your overall emotional, spiritual and physical well-being…and balance yourself out.
 

Walking from the car to the store entrance doesn’t qualify as exercise.  I became quite aware of this 8 years ago when my doctor looked at my high cholesterol and high blood pressure and asked what I was doing for exercise.  I answered: “I walk really, really fast through airports because I travel on business 5 days a week and am always in danger of missing a plane.”  She laughed because I can be somewhat of a comedienne at times.  And then she got serious and told me that the only thing I accomplish with quick dashes through airports to catch almost missed planes is….added stress…which produces extra cortisol (the stress hormone) which causes extra weight gain.  As opposed to 20 minutes or more of consistent, planned exercise that produces stress relieving, metabolism revving endorphins!
 

So, yeah – it requires a purposeful plan to be healthy after 50. For motivation, start thinking about the rewards of your plan.  There are many!  And start imagining how wonderfully awesome it will feel to tell a very surprised acquaintance that you are 65 – when that person was pretty sure you were in your early 40’s with all that vibrancy and healthy glow you give out!

So consider your goals, make a plan, and if you’re like me – writing down the plan helps.  Then check in with yourself regularly!
 

Now, whether or not you’re a fan - Suzanne Somers has been on the forefront of purposeful health for many years now.  She is over 60 in this video (she is currently 65 years old) – and here she speaks about some of the purposeful work required to be healthy in this current culture!  She has done so much research - so enjoy this wealth of information!

And don't forget you can subscribe to this blog via email!  However, don't forget to peruse all the information on this blog!

Happy National Women's Health Week!
Cheryl

Sunshine on My Shoulders Makes Me Happy!

Doctor:  “Your Vit. D levels are low.”

Me:  “I live in Oregon.”

Doctor:  (chuckle) “I know.  But we need to get them higher.”

Me: “I’ll move to Hawaii. Will insurance pay for that?”

Doctor: (chuckle) “No.”

Me:  “Dang.”

Doctor: “Increase your Vit. D intake to 4,000 I.U’s per day.  And ideally get 10 minutes of natural sunlight per day.”

What I was thinking:  “Seriously?  Do you LIVE in Oregon?”

What I said: “Okay.”

And so goes the most recent conversation I’ve had with my doctor who was brilliant enough to test my Vitamin D levels.

And for good reason.  I’m over 60 and…yes...post-menopausal.  The older you get, the less Vitamin D you produce.  Ugh.  Add to that, my genetic history of osteoporosis from my mom and grandma – both having had multiple, spontaneous fractures after the age of 60.  And, hey, I live in Oregon, land of rain, where you own multiple stylish umbrellas, not sunglasses.   Put all of that together with a job that keeps me at the computer much of the day, and yeah…I’m definitely high risk for Vitamin D deficiency.  No surprises there!

Vitamin D deficiency is often overlooked because the early symptoms are usually subtle.  But here’s the deal.  If you’re over 40, spend much of your time indoors, live in a low sun region, and aren’t really big on eating oily fish and dairy products…you’re most likely deficient.  I can’t say you ARE deficient.  But since 100 million Americans are estimated to have Vitamin D deficiency…the likelihood is pretty great.

And before you Florida, Arizona, California, Hawaii, Africa girls dismiss the idea of Vitamin D deficiency and pity the rest of us living in web footed regions…you’re also at risk.  Just because you have sunshine on your shoulders more often doesn’t mean you’re getting the recommended 10 minutes a day on your non-sunscreened skin that is recommended to prevent…rickets.  

In fact, one of the problems with a technology based culture is that more and more people are staying inside!  And more and more of us are wearing sunscreen on exposed body parts in obedience to dermatologists who have scared us silly with threats of skin cancer and…heaven forbid…wrinkles and age spots!  It’s a difficult dilemma.  But one that needs to be considered.

Because here are some of the problems associated with Vitamin D deficiency:

1    *Osteoporosis – this condition of brittle bones affects over 10 million adults over the age of 50

2    *Seasonal Affective Disorder – this mood related, low serotonin depression occurs commonly when people            are deprived of natural light, in particular sunlight.  Just think how much happier your mood is when the sun  shines!

3    *Higher risk of cancer – research shows a link between cancer risk and low Vitamin D levels.

4    *Higher risk of cardiovascular disease and events – there is a higher prevalence of stroke and heart attack in those with Vitamin D deficiency.

5    * Higher risk of diabetes

6    *Higher risk of autoimmune diseases

There’s more.  Vitamin D therapy has shown to increase immunity to viruses!   You get the idea. We're just now realizing how important this Vitamin is.  Decades ago, no one expected Vitamin D deficiency to cause anything but rickets – a skeletal disease that pretty much prompted Vitamin D fortified milk and cereal.  It used to be a common idea that “old women” just broke hips.  Because they were old.   Boo!  Doctors used to recommend increased calcium supplementation to protect our aging bones - except that women were still suffering from osteopenia and full blown osteoporosis in spite of it.  Turns out Vitamin D is what’s necessary for the body to even absorb the calcium.

 

Bottom line.  Ask your doctor to check your Vitamin D level.  Please.  Every woman over 40 should have this test.  It is a simple blood test.  And it will yield a volume of information about what’s going on in your body and help you make a plan for an active, dynamic, fully productive future.

 

For myself, finding out that I was minimally deficient tells me that although I’m already doing a lot to protect my bones from a genetic tendency towards osteoporosis – like exercising regularly, taking a Vitamin D supplement, taking natural plant-based hormones…I can do more.  Like break away from the computer and  get myself outside for at least 10 minutes on those rare but blessed sunny days in Oregon – and yes…like the doctor ordered, increase my Vitamin D3 drops (make sure you’re taking Vitamin D3) for the extra edge. 

 

Here are the Vitamin D3 drops that I take and are approved by my doctor:

http://www.pureformulas.com/vitamin-d3-liquid-225ml-by-pure-encapsulations.html

Everything else you need to know about Vitamin D is contained in this EXCELLENT video by Dr. Oz - so please take the time to watch!

And here’s a little moment of sunshine happiness for you.  Enjoy!

Cheryl

Muscle Up, Ladies!

Hopefully, by now, you know that the numbers in your age don't have to limit you, confine you, identify you or boss you around!

But we do need to be realistic about practical issues that can result in limitations if we are not purposeful and active in preventing them. I'd like to throw out one of those practical, need-to-be-aware-of issues that affects women - especially after the age of 50! It's both concerning - and quite frankly - a little creepy!

First, the concerning part. Did you know that you lose an average of 5% of your muscle mass every ten years after the age of 35? Unless you do something about it, that is. This muscle loss is called sarcopenia, and by age 55, you've lost about 10% of the muscle you once had. By 65...20%.

It gets worse...sigh...

Couple the demise of your muscle mass with a sedentary lifestyle - too much eating, not enough moving - and you'll have more than "bat wing" triceps to deal with!

Here's a major problem with muscle loss. Muscles protect joints and bones. So when muscles go, joints and bones are more vulnerable. It's a perfect storm for pain and debilitating conditions that make you want to stay either inactive or sedated! And this is why so many women in our age group try this line: "I just want to age gracefully." Basically, that's like saying, "I'm not going to do anything about it because muscle wasting is a natural part of aging." And then women resign themselves to pain, medication, and inactivity. Problem is...there's nothing graceful about muscle loss.

And here's the kinda creepy part. You have more muscle to deal with than you probably know. You may think bulky biceps are for weight lifters. And you may have given up on toned quadriceps since you don't plan to wear a swimsuit again in like...ever. But have you considered that the inside of your intestines are lined with muscle tissue? That's kinda how they get their job done - muscle contractions. I know! Creepy, right? I hate to tell you but when all the obviously visible muscles sag and lose their tone? So do all the ones you cannot see. And I refuse to describe what that could mean for your future. But I'm pretty sure you'll get it if you think on it! And let me also throw this out: the heart is a muscle.

So...muscle wasting becomes a bit more serious than looking decent in a tank top this summer - although that's an awesome goal!  What to do?

Well, muscles need two things
1. They need to be fed complete protein
2. They need to be exercised

That's pretty much it. But both require work. Because let's face it, to stay healthy, dynamic, and irritatingly energetic after 50 requires more effort than when we were 30. It just does.

BUT...the benefits of digging into this and maintaining and building healthy muscle mass are huge!

1. Protection for your bones and joints, heart and intestines
2. Increased mobility and strength
3. Increased metabolism
4. You simply look better and healthier, feel better and healthier, and have more confidence

What to Feed Muscles? Complete protein is what feeds muscle tissue. This means protein that includes all 9 essential amino acids that your body cannot make on its own. Some foods are complete proteins all by themselves. Muscles can use these proteins as they are: meat/fish/poultry, milk, yogurt, eggs

Other foods are considered "incomplete" proteins, in that they have some of the essential amino acids - but not all - and therefore the muscles will not use them as is. These incomplete proteins need to be combined with each other to create complete proteins that the muscles can use. These incomplete proteins are: nuts, beans, grains, seeds, peas/legumes, corn

So - eat some beans wrapped in a tortilla? Complete protein. Slap some almond butter on whole grain bread? Complete protein. But the nuts alone? Not a complete protein, although an excellent source of healthy fat and complex carbohydrates.

It's important to know how much protein your body needs. The requirement increases when you exercise. Once you know how much protein you need, you can figure out the best way to get it, in the leanest healthiest way possible. There's a nifty protein calculator here that you can use:
http://biprousa.com/calculator/

Women often ask me what I do to avoid muscle wasting. Although everyone is different, my best strategy involves lots of exercise and a diet rich in fish, lean meat, beans, whole grains, nut butter, and Greek yogurt. But to truly supplement in a way that meets the demands of my age (62) and my exercise level - I must supplement with whey protein that I put in my oatmeal, my yogurt - or make yummy smoothies. Here's the one I use.  It's a complete protein, gluten free, no taste, no added anything:

http://www.biprousa.com/bipro.html#

Using Our Muscles... Well, it's whey easier (sorry!) to discuss eating than working out...But here's the deal. There is simply no way to build, maintain, and preserve muscle mass without exercise. Sorry - but I can't sugar coat it... You just won't be able to sip a protein smoothie from the recliner every night and call it good. You gotta USE those muscles you're feeding if you want to keep them!

Now, of course, you don't need to be a body builder. You don't even need a gym. Some inexpensive, light, hand held weights and a good video can do the trick and will pay off in the future if you're consistent. Better yet - join a fitness toning class - because it's way more fun exercising in a group, and the time goes super fast! Of course, I'm a little pro-group fitness because I teach Zumba Toning classes - and they are excellent for strengthening, building, and toning those muscles!

Did you know that it's no longer fashionable to be skinny? Skinny looks unhealthy and the whole wasting away, hollowed out thing is never good fashion sense. "Strong is the new skinny" - and it is a principle I firmly believe in. Work at being strong and fit - and you will feel fabulous, look fabulous far past your 50's - and your muscles...ALL of them (creepy!) will thank you! Time to muscle up, ladies, for a healthy, dynamic life after 50!

Cheryl

Seasons Change

Here's an oldie for you. Name that tune. "Seasons change and so did I, you need not wonder why." If you're over 55, you should know that one! "No Time Left for You," by The Guess Who.

In 1970, I played that song over and over and over. On a record player, mind you. If you're too young to be reading this blog, you'll be like... "Record player?" But yeah. Had the album (American Woman). And that one line in the song seemed to resonate with me, even at the age of 20 when life was ridiculously simple.

Perhaps, it was a foreshadowing of one of the most real truths I've learned: life is seasonal. At any given moment, we are walking through the barrenness of winter, or the dying leaves of fall, or the new life of spring or my favorite season summer - when things either heat up or calm down. Life doesn't always coordinate perfectly with the natural seasons, but you get the main idea. Seasons change.

When I merged into college life, my small world of high school friendships expanded into a big world of new acquaintances. Of course, there was no Facebook or Twitter or any other form of faceless technology that would allow me to have a million followers without really knowing any of them. In the 70's, everyone we met - we had to talk to - in person - with eye contact and body language and voice inflections. Many of those encounters were temporary and ended with graduation. A few would get truly joined to you and last a lifetime. But it was a season you expected to end. You knew after graduation, everything would change - and you'd move on.

Another huge seasonal shift happens in the lives of women after 50. But unlike our 20's, we now tend to resist the indicators that speak loudly of impending change. And we hate letting go. What was once a flippant "no time left for you...I'm on my way to better things" is now a grueling internal fight to hold on to whatever has become familiar, whatever has become comfortable, whatever has filled our empty emotional places - even when we know it is time to shift, move on, change directions, venture out, and let go...

We have spent decades building our nest. We have our patterns, our rituals and routines, our friends, our fantasies, our jobs, our families, our homes, our comfort foods, our grudges, our unused exercise equipment, our schedules, our opinions, our obsessions, our fears, and our wounds that filter our reactions to people and life in general...

So when the indicators begin to spring up in our lives - that tell us it's time to let go, time to move on, time to switch it up, time to shift, time to exercise, time to eat healthier, time to extend grace, time to forgive, time to heal, time to be free from the pain of the past - we resist. We fight to ignore the indicators that sometimes hit us in the face, they are so obvious. And we sometimes say, "I'm too old" or "It's too late..." Or, "This is the way I've always done it..."

But your destiny is not tied to your age. Your purpose does not end at 50 or 60 or 65, when the world tells you to "retire." You have a purpose and destiny that was planted in you before you were born - and it will exist as long as you're hanging out on this planet! But to walk in it will require a willingness to pay attention to the indicators - and to shift, move forward, let go, and leave the nest of "comfortable."

I did not plan to be a Zumba Fitness instructor at the age of 60. In fact, it is almost laughable in light of my life's journey, which was mostly a comfortable career in education and public speaking. Certainly, I never wrote "fitness instructor" into a personal mission statement or a ten-year goal plan! But like most women, I'm pretty intuitive, and I began to sense a shift in my life - and the indicators began to point me in that direction.

And although I had a few raised eyebrows (from people who like to limit a woman's ability based on the numbers in her age), I went with my gut. I paid attention to the indicators. And I'm still going strong - and am in the best health of my life. But equally important, I've gained relationships - real ones - that were destined for this particular season of my life. Sometimes, we just gotta say, "No time left for you" to the familiar voices and patterns that are holding us back. And say, "I'm on my way to better things."

Don't be afraid to take flight. The advantage of being over 50 is that you've been groomed for this seasonal shift for decades! Get unstuck. Get motivated for change. Find the joy of a new horizon that you really won't be able to see if you're burrowed too deep in your nest. Hop to the edge of that nest and look out. Seasons change. So did I. You need not wonder why.

Cheryl



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Birthday Encouragement

Okay. I know. I haven't uttered a word here since August 2010. And if you know me at all, you'll agree that 18 months is a long time for Cheryl to be silent. But in the immortal words of Ecclesiastes, there is a time for everything..."a time to be silent and a time to speak..." And let's just give The Byrds a high five and say, "There is a season, turn, turn, turn."

So, I'm turning over some pages in the calendar and starting a new season of the Health, Passion and Purpose After 50 blog - which I'm purposefully kicking off today - my birthday. Yep, that's today. Am I going to tell you how old I am? Yeah, but not yet. First - the back story.

Somewhere in the early 1970's(huge clue), I realized I marched "to the beat of a different drummer." I never felt compelled to apologize for that. I simply had no desire to live up to the cultural stereotype of an "older woman." I never understood the phrase, "growing old gracefully." And I still don't get that unless it means don't wear mini-skirts after 60. I do kinda agree with that. I have zero interest in the word "retire" unless it is referring to a sound, healthy night's sleep! And I have no emotional attachment to the numbers in my birth age.

All I've ever wanted was to be healthy, vibrant, productive, purposeful and passionate about life.

But over the years, I discovered that our culture truly does tend to define and limit women by the numbers in their age. The actor, Sean Connery, played the distinguished, sexy, get-all-the-women double agent, James Bond, well into his 70's. How many 70-year-old actresses get the distinguished, sexy, get-all-the-men roles? None. They are all making commercials for AARP and pharmaceutical companies.

And so, for the last decade or so - I have rarely given out my age for fear someone might think less of my capability, less of my desirability, less of the possibilities I have to maintain a youthful spirit. When someone would ask my age, I would always respond, "How old do you think I am?" I figured that however old someone perceived me to be held more weight than the actual numbers (one of which is a 2). My desire has been to remove the numbers from life's equation and simply live life to the fullest. I was never very good at math anyway.

I have spent the past almost 20 years researching, investigating, reading and observing. And it is my belief that most women over 50 just want to know they are still beautiful, desirable, have purpose, a calling, and a destiny. And most women over 50 really want to feel great, be healthy and fit, have energy, and foster deep emotional connections with the important people in their lives. I've never talked to a woman over 50 who said, "I really just want to sit on the couch, eat Oreos, gain weight, have high blood pressure, get brittle bones and then die."

And so my vision for this blog is to inspire women in the middle "boomer" years to take some control over their lives and jump into this thing called healthy, passionate, purposeful living! I don't have all the answers, by any stretch. But I have scaled a few mountains, tried out some things, had a few epic failures and then had a lot of victories - and I know the pursuit is worth it.

Here's a few things I've learned:

1. Menopause does not have to define you, limit you, destroy or kill you!
2. Every woman has purpose and a destiny. That doesn't formally end at 65.
3. You don't have to be overweight just because you're over 50!
4. You CAN be healthier than you were at 30 or 40!
5. You are capable of much more than you think you are!
6. You have not lost your desirability - unless you want it to be gone!
7. You do not have to be depressed, bitter, angry, or bitchy!
8. Healthy eating doesn't have to be horrible.
9. Exercise does not have to be horrible.
10.Health and vitality requires proactive effort.

If you are a woman over 50 who wants to jump into this little adventure of healthy, dynamic living with me - then let's do it! I will be here to support you, share tips and information with you, and inspire you. Sign up to receive this blog via email. Become a member of this blog. Share the link with other awesome women over 50 who might want or need a little inspiration and motivation from time-to-time.

And for you men who have tip toed into this blog out of pure curiosity...let me throw out a tip or two to you :) Dynamic, vibrant, beautiful, healthy women over 50 need men who can keep up! So, get the remote out of your hands, guys - and...um...keep up!

Okay. So, today I turned 62 years of age. My profile photo was taken when I was just shy of 60 (I throw that in because people often ask if it is a current photo). I feel better than I did when I was 35. I am healthier than I was at 40. I'm more fit and strong than I was...ever. It did not happen by passive resistance or solely from good genes, although I have some great ones. I only know I have a destiny. And I never want to have to say I'm too tired, too overweight, too unhealthy, too unfit, too depressed, too bitter to fulfill it.

"If you hear a different drummer -- dreamer take a chance... The road you choose to travel.. means the difference in the dance."

Here's where you can find me when I'm in my 90's! How about you?

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